Question: Do you know what I mean by “Mexican Style”?  Kinda like, “You know you’re Mexican if you know what taking a shower/bath Mexican Style means?”….

Well, do ya?

Here is my confession of the night.  Gente, I was a Virgin.

Obviously, not that kind of virgin.  I was a spa virgin.  I’ve never been to one.  My cousin goes regularly and I hear everyone say it’s heaven on earth, but was never really tempted to go.   So, imagine my surprise when I got the invite.  We arrived at the resort and we were escorted to the spa.  ( Again, I have to tell you that if you’ve never been there, I truly recommend that you go.  If you are EVER in the area, this resort is a must!)

Now, rumor had it, that we were just going to be treated for a Mani/Pedi and little things like that, so in my mind I was SO ready for that.  Remember, I still am an Mani/Pedi virgin.

“Oh hello Liz, welcome to Pacific Waters Spa, come this way”  the hostess said.

I followed.

“What size shoe do you wear?”

I told her.

“Here you go”

My eyes grew B I G!  She gave me slippers and a BATA!

“If you follow me, I’ll show you to your locker.” she said.

I swear I couldn’t move.  The minute she said that, I notice that everyone was walking around in their Batas.  Without their street clothes underneath!!!  Thank God the locker was close by.

For those of you who know me, the first thing that might come across your mind is “Plane Jane”.  I am a Plane Jane.  Very conservative. Very shy(at first). Very quiet. Extremely self-conscious.  Que viva las Chancludas!!

“Ok, you can leave all your belongings here.  Leave your underwear on and remember to take the key with you.”  I sat down and I swear it was like I was in Gym class back in High School.  I never undressed in front of my classmates in gym class.  I always used the bathroom. Always!  I started to think of a way to do something… anything… but do what I had to do.  “Ahora si Liz, te jodiste!” I thought.  How in the world? Oh my Lord.  Well….. ni modo!  I asked if there was a changing room, there was. As I was changing all I could say was OMG. OMG. OMG. OMG!  What are you doing? Mira que no mas!  Caminando con solo una bata ensima?  Ay yay yay….. Ay!!! So, I did it.  Y para cabarle de fregar, ni me quedaba la mendiga bata.  Apenas me cubria la nalgota que tengo! But,I did it. Oh and the faja stood on!  LOL

Little did I know this wasn’t the worst part.  They took us to this tranquil room where they had yummy drinks and nuts to eat.  I was the first to be called in my group, so off I went.  My first stop: A massage.

I’ve never had a massage before.  I don’t even like my husband giving me one.  I don’t know why?  The thought of someone placing their hands on you and rubbing you, me da quien sabe que? I get in the low lit room, the wonderful masseuse came in and in a very calm, low voice she said, “Hi my name is so-and-so(I see the bed and I start to get nervous) and I will give you a 15 min. massage.  I’ll walk out for a while, so you can take off your robe,(my knees are starting to wobble) and get under the sheet.  I’ll be back so we can start the massage.”

Oh My Jesus. I took it off, and quickly got into the bed,(looking around for cameras or peeping toms) and under the thin sheets.  omg, omg, omg, omg Liz.  What are you doing? Mira donde te fuistes a meter.  Mira donde andas.  Y ENCUERADA , dios mio!!  Padre santisimo de los cielos!!!

Sorry, I think A LOT in Spanish….

The masseuse walks back in and bless her heart, she is a true professional. She explained what she was going to do and did it in the most loving way possible.  She kept trying to convince me to close my eyes, but for the love of God, I couldn’t.  LOL

She was AMAZING!  She was gentle, and good and caring.  She pointed out my trouble spots and recommended some stuff. WOW!  It was wonderful…. I mean, besides the whole “take off your clothes and put on a bata” thing.  By the end of the night, having walked around the gorgeous spa for about 2 1/2 hours, media encuerada, a hand massage and a mini-facial.  I am hooked!  I want to go back.  The 60 min. massage, the facial, the saunas…. I want it all!

I want to try out the “full” spa experience.  I want it!!

Bata and all!

Gracias to the Hyatt-Huntington Beach, Pacific Waters Spa,  and their staff,  for being my first……  Truly, First Class service!

Mom (leaving a voicemail)~” Te tengo un chismonte, bye!”

**sigh**

I swear, this señora needs something to do, other than “chismotes“.   Granted that I live with the woman, too!  I wait to get home so she can tell me “El Gran Chisme”

It had nothing to do with my family, nothing to do with anyone I know…. UGH!  She went on and on about the news of fulano de tal.  I won’t tell you guys what she said… cuz I am not the one to talk, but let me tell you that if I did know this person….  Just kidding.

As I was closing the door to home, I hear something that made me laugh like never before!

” Ni se te ocurra poner lo que te dije, en el Interrnet, ok….más te vale, Elizabet”

OOMMGGG!!!

So, in rebellion…Vine y lo puse en el Interrnet! <— yup, you gotta roll the tongue when you say it…